Monday, July 13, 2009

sunday my brother

Sunday my brother
now an old fisherman
took us in his boat
up brown river

through turns and trees
years fell away in ripples
as in seasons long ago
when humid air was still

turtles, fish, mossy fallen painted signs
by snags from leaning, half sunken trees
a heron tall in the branches watching
the river course changes
from flood and growth
always changing
water up and water down

a golf course where a farm used to be
now many new houses
old shacks fallen
a corner where we camped
another where we fished
duck blind in the marsh
a spot we had ventured to
paddling a canoe up mud brook creek
by jumping fish, sleeping deer and water birds
some sweet summer ago

4 comments:

Julie said...

Beautiful. I love the images and the flow (no pun intended). The third stanza is excellent, though I love them all. Again, this one hits me with a thump. The golf course where the farm used to be is so sad but true.

jack sender said...

TomC said...

I love this and I love the title - let's make a movie of the same name! I have been wanting to soak a nightcrawler lately and this whets my appetite even more. Nice piece of work Jack. You should consider spending a day after walleye with John x...... he is the most patient fisherman and teacher I have ever met. I wasn't expecting that but he is.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

jack sender said...

Using the first line for the title, as I mentioned to Annie one time, comes from my poetry roots and the avant-garde poets of the fifties; in this case I really like it. The words set up there the way I want. It has a hum to it that seems right.

Poetry to me uses few words to paint an entire scene, enabling the reader you to see the story and the poet.

Tom, I removed the name you mentioned in your comment and put the comment back without it . (My hearing loss in my right ear stems from the time that stupid shit snuck up behind me in high school and yelled as loud as he could in my ear to see me jump. I guess I didn’t get over it.)

Julie, I worked around the last line a bit also, “some sweet summer ago” fell right into place for me. Aloud it is a bit sloppy, but in my head it reads well, it feels warm and comfy.

Annie said...

"Years fell away in ripples..."

I love the "voice" of this poem, your voice. It reads beautifully.