i need go over again,
searching carefully each clue
as to where is up
for me, for you, it keeps changing
there’s been faint trace
like a bird puff gone to wind,
aloft - the shifting of the old tree.
ground level - wind licking long strokes in lawns
stuff is old, i see it around me
don’t let me kid myself
the wind is cold by night
as day old dinner left lying on the shelf
rampant speculation leads to inaccuracies
following closely pit padding heels of worry
abandoning hurry, do softly tread,
leave no space, show nor dread.
as we race handle our duties,
scurrying about have no doubt,
in the end, as my mother said,
kid, everything always works out
Friday, April 30, 2010
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2 comments:
I love this poem. I've read it over and over.
One tiny suggestion: As I read it aloud, each time, my voice substitutes the word "paddling" for padding. The sound of it works with this poem, and I think, extends what you are saying in this line, blending the images of pit padding, and the motion of "paddling." There are a lot of "l" sounds (which I enjoy immensely), and "paddling" would add to them, weaving into the total effect.
I love this poem. I've read it over and over, enjoying the sound and the tone of it. There are many wonderful lines, ideas, and images, interwoven, and the total effect immerses the reader in your reflection.
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